Patterns play a vital role in our everyday lives. As the saying goes, we are creatures of habit. Patterns help to simplify our lives by triggering familiar thoughts and actions in response to familiar information and situations. Recognizable patterns are how our brain processes and organizes the world around us. However certain patterns can leave us feeling stuck.
In this video I talk about how these patterns can keep us feeling stuck, the immense power that patterns have in your life, why you need to know about patterns and how to work with them so you can get unstuck.
Patterns have an incredible power. They can take on a life of their own when they are strengthened by repetition and are associated with strong feelings. Strong patterns can also keep us stuck.
One of the most power patterns is the self-pattern, the sum of all of our experiences, knowledge and feelings we have about ourselves. These experiences are carried around in our central nervous system. They represent the significant people in our life, past and present. We also carry with us meaningful experiences and events that elicit strong feelings. This can include our time in high school and our first sexual experience.
These patterns strongly impact how we perceive our world, experiences and other individuals. New individuals you meet are perceived by the patterns of experiences you have had with previous individuals. Patterns have tremendous power on our present behavior without us even being aware of them.
Feeling stuck? Here are two steps to help you identify and understand the patterns that are holding you back:
- Take notice of patterns in your life, patterns that you may not have been aware or conscious of before. Think of what really bothers you about someone, like your boss, a friend, a colleague or your partner. What specifically bothers you? What is the emotional trigger? Perhaps it’s when the individual blames others or does not take responsibility. Where have you noticed this pattern in your life? You may want to look at your childhood as this is where many patterns begin. Maybe your mother blamed you for a lot of things. Or your father relinquished responsibility and placed it onto you.
- Allow this pattern, whatever it may be, to have space. What has this pattern, or behavior meant for you? For instance, if your father placed responsibility onto you, what does that mean for you in your life today? Are you afraid of responsibility? Do you take on too much responsibility? Do you feel responsible for others when they are not your responsibility to being with?
That emotional trigger that you have about the action or behavior of another individual is a powerful. Recognizing the pattern and understanding where it comes from will help to diminish its emotional charge. This will help you get unstuck. Listen to your emotions and your feelings. They will lead you to greater self-awareness and help you cultivate a deeper understanding of who you truly are.
I would love to hear what patterns you have observed in your life and those that are leaving you feeling stuck. Please comment below.